Mind over MattersMichael J. Nelson is best known from his work on Mystery Science Theater 3000. This was a brilliant show and ran for about 10 years. Since MST3K went off the air 10 years ago, Mike Nelson has written a few books. They are wonderful and the humor is top notch. I have read two of them to date and have enjoyed them thoroughly.

Just last week I was waiting in a lobby for someone while reading Mind over Matters. I started to feel like an idiot the moment I realized that I was laughing out loud while reading. This is not a book to read around strangers, for you will laugh out loud.

If you are a fan of MST3K, you are doing yourself a very great injustice if you do not read this book. The humor will be very familiar and appreciative.

In this collection of more than fifty essays, Nelson turns his wit on everything from the annoying names people have for their elderly relatives (Grumpy Floppy and the Flo-Flo) to the sad decline of the flesh-based diet (A Panegyric to Meat).

His sadness at its passing is evident in this excerpt:

A recent problem that has definitely affected the way people think about meat is the necessity for restaurants to use an annealing furnace to raise the internal temperature of their hamburgers to 1200 degrees Kelvin and keep it there for forty-three hours in order to kill foodborne illnesses. The resulting disk of singed flesh is absolutely indistinguishable in texture and flavor from a piece cut from a rubber mouse pad. McDonald’s is aware of the problem and has taken steps to improve flavor by putting up more Playlands. Wendy’s has gone a different direction and come out with their new Smoky B’con, Honey Mustard (Pasteurized Processed Mustard Food), and Mushroom and Swiss™ Mouse Pads and ‘Rist Protectors crafted from the durable meat product. (They can be bought separately or as desk sets, which are very popular as graduation gifts.)

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